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Date: Tue, 10 Apr 2001 02:01:17 -0700 (PDT)
You make over $200,000 a year and still can't afford a
house.
It's sprinkling outside, so you leave for work an hour
early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
Your child's third grade teacher has purple hair, a
nose ring, and is named Breeze.
Your Governor's first name is "Grey" (just like his
demeanor)
You can't remember... is pot legal?
The only person that comes to your house at night,
when you call, Is the "Pizza Guy"
You have a therapist for every emotion ....hence?
anger management, depression specialist, happy hour,
etc...
You've been to a baby shower for an infant who has two
mothers and a sperm donor.
You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee
beans are grown, and can taste the difference between
Sumatran and Ethiopian.
You know what smog tastes like.
You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
You need customer service to unlock a cabinet to buy a
pregnancy test (which happens to be locked in with
condoms)
You can't remember... is pot legal?
A really great parking space can move you to tears.
Your Fruit in your fruit bowl are not edible but, your
underwear in the drawer are.
The guy in line at Starbucks, wearing the baseball
cap, sunglasses, and looks like George Clooney, IS
George Clooney.
Your dog is bilingual (meow)
Your car insurance costs as much as your house
payment.
It's sprinkling out, and there's a report on every
news channel about "THE STORM!"
Hey... is pot legal?
Over 85% of the cities, towns, and streets start with
San, Los, El, La, Santa, De La, or De Los.
There are more lawyers than doctors in the phone book.
Two overcast days in a row drive you mad.
A family of four owns six vehicles.
Everyone who lives here knows that hurricanes,
tornadoes, floods and snowstorms are way worse than
earthquakes, which are, after all, over almost as soon
as you realize what's happening.
Even if the store is across the street, you drive
there.
Yeah, you're sure...? pot is legal.
And finally, a question:
Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a
light bulb?
A. None. Californians cannot afford to turn on the
lights.
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Received on Tue Apr 10 2001 - 02:01:21 PDT
